Face of a schoolgirl, mouth of a lumberjack. Writer (professionally, obituaries; personally, scathing essays), book junkie, no good with directions. Great at burning toast. Lover of beards, men with full-sleeve tattoos, and fresh mozzarella. Vanquisher of injustice and gelatto. Laughs at farts only if they are my own. Spendthrift. Will one day own a croquet set.